Santa's Whiskers

Nicholas S. Claus Forced Into Retirement

Early this morning the North American division of Whiskers & Company, an international toy manufacturing and Christmas Eve delivery service, announced that it would no longer need the services of Nicholas S. Claus as advertising character and brand builder.

St. Nicholas, founder and CEO of Whiskers & Company Internationale, spoke with praise of Santa’s accomplishments during his tenure with the company.  “We hired Santa Claus to head the North American operations back in 1822 on the recommendation of his long time mentor, Clement C. Moore.  It was Moore who helped him find a few reindeer, a small group of elves and a home near the North Pole where he could set up an in-home craft business.”  The craft business grew rapidly and today Whiskers & Company North America is a thriving operation that rivals Mattell in toy manufacturing and  UPS and FedEx in delivery experience.

According to a company spokesman the forced retirement announcement does not come as a complete surprise. “Santa was so good at building the North American operation there is no longer any significant competition. He worked himself out of a job. On-line Santa websites, internet ordering, and Chinese manufacturing make Santa Claus obsolete as an advertising character and brand builder.”

​ Saint Nicholas has promised that Santa Claus will receive the opportunity for job retraining and will be coached in job hunting strategies to help him find new work in a different industry. He’ll probably have to lose to the laugh and the outfit, and maybe the white beard, if he wants to find other employment in the current tight job market. Brand building advertising characters are not in great demand, but Santa does have lots of experience.  

by Craig Hosterman